Compassion

This morning at Church Tim Hanna from Compassion Australia came to speak. Before he did, though,  he showed this short film.

 

A few parts of this film got to me. But perhaps the biggest part was when one of the men talked about how he watched his 10 month old sister die in the arms of his mother from starvation.

20 minutes prior to seeing this I had woken up my sleepy head of a 10 month old, carried him to Sunday School and left him there as I went on to church without him. The biggest of his worries would be no food for an hour, and whether he would play with a truck or a ball downstairs.

I read recently in Lisa Bevere's book Nurture about babies dying in Africa because the mother herself didn't have enough nutrition to supply milk in her breasts. While we are so blessed to have the breast or bottle option, and what seeming to be the biggest worry of that decision is whether we will be judged for the choice we make.

And then our pastor showed us a video of his recent trip to Salatiga in Indonesia, where he and his family were breaking down in tears visiting his sponsor child of 22 years. I was fighting back tears. At the end as the band sang a song and images flashed of different children of different cultures with big smiling faces, I looked to the ground and bit my lip and tried so hard not to cry. Some of the faces were so obviously Indonesian (there's just this look about them), confirmed by the sight of the red and white Indonesian flag in the background.

I know people get all cynical about child sponsorship and the like, but I urge you, please, consider sponsoring a child today. We know, for a fact, that sometimes in countries such as Indonesia there is a lot of problems with corruption with money, that's why sponsoring a child through an Australian (or any other trusted international organisation) is a fantastic way to help others in the world. And when our money can go so far in a place like Indonesia - wow. It's a bit more than just giving a cup of water to the least of these.

I haven't got much more to say, other than, click here and sponsor a child today.

Happy Birsday to me

I was lucky enough to spend my birthday in Jakarta this year. It was really special, as I have never had a birthday in Indonesia before. This was quite honestly the best birthday, ever.

Luke woke me up simultaneously with the sound of the mosque at around 5am. We often woke up at this time with the rest of Jakarta going for prayer or getting ready for work. My mother and father in law go out for sport at this time, so we decided to go out as well.

First we went to the local 'traditional' market. They sell food, clothes and goldfish. I have always liked this more 'cultural' aspect of Indonesia rather than the big shopping malls of Jakarta. It is something that I have struggled with since constantly visiting Jakarta, as it's not the Indonesia I grew to know and love.

The market is near my sister in laws house, so I texted her and said that we were just around the corner. She responded in about 12 seconds with a text that said "come here". So in we got into sang kotak (my pet name for Hendrik's dying box car with no aircon) and drove around the corner to my sister in laws house.

Ros, the maid opened the gate and ushered us in. Then, from around the corner my two sister in laws were singing, "happy birrrrsssssday to youuuuu, happy birrrrsssday to youuuuuu." (I love that their Indonesian accent even comes through in song). They presented me a cake with the big numbers '26' on top. I posed for a photo as the wax dripped onto the cake, my cheeks aching as my sister in law was trying to look for how to take a photo on her tablet. Finally, here it is -

It was a cheese cake. Literally. Cheese. Indonesians like the whole cheese and sweet thing combination. Chocolate and cheese, banana and cheese... This was a sponge cake with shredded cheese on top. And some wax for taste.

I even got a present... wrapped in Christmas paper!

Now, we wouldn't be in Indonesia if we didn't have our inaugral seafood feast. I love that in Jakarta we can eat seafood for the same price as a large big mac meal and a sundae. The only catch is you have to eat with your hands - which is great fun none the less.

They had a big fish pond. Luke has since started saying "ish" (fish - we have a tank at home and he loves it).

Somewhere they said that we were entitled to a birthday cake and noodles if it was my birthday. I didn't bring my passport as proof of date of birth, but luckily I had my Australian Drivers Licence (I tried to pretend it was a student card to get a discount once, didn't work.)

I got a little more than a cake and noodles. Suddenly four staff members came in, banging buckets and singing, "happy birrrrssssday too youuuuuuu..." (yep, same accent as my sister in laws). They even had sparklers! Luke watched in shock as I went up the front to collect my gifts!

In Indonesia they believe that noodles represent a long life, so they always eat these on their birthday. Red eggs represent prosperity, and I think that is more a Chinese thing. So eating noodles and red eggs is kind of like saying, live long and prosper!

I even got a coconut drink!

And this is (part of) the lovely family I married into. My Dad in law, Mum in law, two sister in laws (what is the plural of 'sister in law!?), Luke, Hendrik and my brother in law (he married sister in law).

This was at Bandar Djakarta in Serpong, by the way. If you're ever in Jakarta, I highly recommend this place. The staff went over and beyond to make my birthday extra special!

The evening was pretty uneventful. We ate vegemite on toast sitting on the cool tiles. My inlaws only have one knife, hence why I used a spoon.

A few days later we checked out the new mall Central Park. We had Sushi Tei for dinner, where I got another 'cake':

Hendrik blessed me with a beautiful present, but that shall be in another blog post.

It's funny to think that Jakarta is now under water. I've heard reports that my inlaws are safe. They can't go too far, and there is flooding, but luckily they're up a hill enough that it hasn't reached the house. Thinking of everyone in Jakarta at the moment. Especially the ones who aren't as fortunate and are currently 'swimming' through 2 metres of toxic water.

The world hasn't ended yet...

The City of Casey put on great Christmas fireworks.
But nothing for New Year!

Because it wouldn't be New Year without a 'the year it was' type post...

I'm one of those people who get a little sentimental about things, particularly around this time of year. I always struggle on New Years Eve thinking that the date changing means a time of letting go. Last year I felt like this as 2012 was going to be the biggest, life changing year ever, and it has definitely proven to do so. And so now, I feel like I have to 'let go' of 2012, and part of me feels sad. Also, 13 is a crappy number. 1 + 3 = 4. No, I'm not Chinese. Really.

I always like to do something 'significant' at New Year, but this year, with Luke in tow, it looks like a quiet one! Luckily our neighbours have saved us - and we will be welcoming in the new year with some of our closest mates!

Anyway, one of the biggest things for me this year has been having this blog. It has helped me to process my new life, and also given me space to write. Without tearing up, I would like to thank you, dear reader, for reading and supporting me this year.

Here are the biggest moments this year:

- I welcomed in the New Year at home
- Got crafty
- Nested like there was no tomorrow. Like a crazy woman.
- Struggled through the third trimester, and admitted that it was the hardest thing I've ever had to go through.
- Had our last Valentines Day as 'just the two of us'.
- Kept a tradition of pancakes every Saturday morning.
- I deactivated Facebook for a month. And it felt good.
- Shopped at Coles. A lot.
- Went to a High Tea. Went into labour that evening. Met a good looking student doctor. 2 days later I fell in love all over again when I met my little boy, Luke!
- Had my first MOTHERS DAY!!!
- Visited the neighbours and gave them cake.
- Waited for the day until Luke slept through the night. 9 months on I'm still waiting...
- Discovered that I actually really liked breast-feeding more than I thought I would. 9 months on I'm still feeding...
- Advocated recycling in Victoria
- Admitted I am a control freak. And I still am struggling to let this go daily.
- Rethought my career.
- Experienced my first earthquake!
- Joined a mothers group. More than one.
- Lived through the winter season barely getting a cold.
- Fought for Indonesian studies. And I'm so excited about the Asian Century. Onya, Julia!
- Took Luke on his first plane trip. And my first ever little plane to the middle of nowhere Mildura.
- Bought got given a Sewing Machine. Learnt to sew.
- Made Luke eat from a bowl.
- Celebrated Hendrik's first birthday as a Dad, as Luke released his first book. Hendrik also had his first fathers day.
- Came to (still coming to) terms that life is different now.
- Fell in love with a gorgeous smile, as did everyone around me.
- Had my Sister in law & her husband visit.
- Watched the Kath & Kim movie in my Pyjamas. At Fountain Gate.
- Cleaned the laundry.
- Started to 'Luke proof' the kitchen. I still have lots to do.
- Became Michelle's Patisserie's favorite customer. Ok, well, Luke did.
- Discovered the terrible business of shopping centre childrens photos.
- Went to Jakarta with a stop over in Bali. And vowed never to fly Air Asia again.
- Survived our first Christmas in Melbourne!

And now, what is in store for 2013? I'd love to loose weight, but I'm not going to write that here and jinx myself. I want to keep learning, and I want to keep loving. I want to make plans and stick to them. I want to work out what I'm really going to do with my career but keep family as number one. I'm looking forward to things as well - like Luke being one, more travel to Indonesia, more blogging, getting a better phone, watching Once Upon A Time, making Pinterest pins come into fruition, and learning how to be a blessing to those around me.

To leave you this year, I'll post you this photo of my boy. Have a good one, and all the best for the new year, my loved, fellow readers!

Have yourself a stressful little Christmas?

Some may say Christmas in Jakarta
is commercialised... But at least they
have pretty decorations.

"I hate this time of year," says most of the people I meet.

I did most of my Christmas shopping before I left for Jakarta because I knew that this week would be crazy. I've already been to Fountain Gate twice and the atmosphere there is anything but joyful and merry. Christmas can bring out the best in people, but a lot of the time it brings out the worst.

And then it gets me thinking, why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we stress over Christmas when there's supposed to be a deeper meaning? Why do I stress that I haven't got 'enough' for someone, like it becomes a matching game of monetary value. What will we eat? What will I wear? Christmas cards. Christmas letters. Family traditions. I haven't got time. Stress, stress, stress.

Whether you believe that Jesus is the reason for the season or not, I'm sure you agree this isn't the way it's supposed to be, right?

Five years ago tomorrow (i remember dates) I would have come home from Kendari, a city with one Christmas tree. Seafood was cheap and it was idul adha the day we left. Then I came home and everything was ridiculously expensive, people were stressing over gifts, yet 48 hours before I was in such a different world where this spirit of stress didn't exist.

And so it's a bit similar now. Jakarta has more than one Christmas tree, but Christmas is very much still a religious celebration over anything (remembering that although Indonesia is a Muslim nation, it is a religious nation none the less). There's a hint of Christmas everywhere you go. Even in the hot weather the bajaj driver wears a Christmas hat. But the spirit of stress isn't there. The stresses in a third world country are so much deeper, and different, but the way they resiliently cope with their poverty never ceases to amaze me - something I wish Australians could learn from.

So as I max out my credit card, buying crap for the sake of having it, I then ask myself what this really is all about. I would love to lovingly create christmas presents, my pinterest is full of ideas. But having just spent the last month overseas has hindered this process. Plus, the thought in the back of my mind that is all about what you spend.

In amongst all the stress there has to be deeper meaning, right? I want to love Christmas. I want to hold my son tight as I sing 'silent night' on a picnic rug to the light of a candle at carols by candle light.

And, let's face it. Probably the highlight of the day on the 25th will be watching Luke open cool presents, then playing with the paper it was wrapped in. (Oh, and just for the record, Luke hate's Santa.. Well, the Myer Santa anyway...)

Maybe we can learn something about such simple joy. Let's keep it simple this Christmas, shall we?

Flight mode

Next time, I'm flying Garuda.

Or finding a carrier that doesn't have this crazy midnight flight.

Today/tonight's blog comes from flight DJ 4105. It has been a long day. The sun is just coming up. My iPhone lock, still on Jakarta time says 1:27. That means its 5:27 in Melbourne.

Today, or should I say yesterday, started at 4am with a little boy who refused to sleep. I'm very grateful for my early-bird mother in law who kindly took Luke so we could get some rest.

We decided to do this the cheap way. We got return flights on Virgin (on the way via Perth) to Denpasar, and then AirAsia to Jakarta.

All seemed to go well on the way (apart from being slugged with a rp 60.000 late fee on AirAsia, and my wallowing 'ohhhhh kasihani aku pak... Saya bawa bayi' totally didn't work and made me look like a fool.) but I think when you go TO your destination you're full of excitement. Then when coming home, the realities of work and chores are faced... And then there's the midnight flight.

I'm unimpressed with AirAsia - I have to pay for Luke on a domestic flight, yet he isn't entitled to any extra carry on (every other airline he was). As Hendrik took shirts out of his luggage to make it less than 20kg, I opened up my little shpheel in frustration about how the heck I am supposed to accommodate for my babies needs. My indonesian seems to be better when I'm angry.

The flight was delayed for over an hour. A good 40 minutes of that sitting on the Tarmac. Coming down was painful, I haven't been well in the last few days - which meant my ears felt like they were going to drop off. This is probably because altitude changes pretty dramatically when you fly to Denpasar as the airport is on sea level. I had had my teeth cleaned in the morning at the dentist, and they ached like crazy! It's safe to say Luke and I were both in tears.

I was almost relieved to get on Virgin, which is strange. There's nothing wrong with them - other than they don't fly to Jakarta! It just felt like there was a sense of efficiency, unlike the queue upon queue at Denpasar airport. That said Im lucky I can jump the queue because my son is Indonesian, so we get to go in the Indonesian line, not with the hundreds of tourists (I Fred to know what the airport is like at peak season!)

It was also a relief to be around Australians, that don't ask why my baby cries!

Anyway, the sun is coming up. I'm going to catch some Zs while I can.

I know this blog makes me sound like i hate indonesia, i don't. I just miss the efficiency of things At home (hope im not speaking too soon). Particularly with a young baby in tow. God has taught me so much about patience since being here. Flying with Luke has definitely conquered my fear of flying.

I'm coming, Melbourne.

(flight mode, upload when I touch down)

The Balloon

Upon arrival in Jakarta, I handed Luke to Hendrik so that he could introduce him to his parents (Luke's Grandparents). Luke leaped straight into Popo's (Grandmas) arms as she gave him a big, red, Mickey Mouse balloon that she had bought especially for him. Knowing my devout Chinese mother in law, it had to be red.

Luke loves balloons. How did she know? I could only dream of having balloons like this when I was young.

Days passed. Luke played with the balloon every day. It as full of helium attached to a stone wrapped in plastic by fishing string (which I was admittedly a bit wary of).

Soon, the helium began to deflate. Luke sat outside in his pram overlooking my Mother in Laws collection of various plants including hibiscus and Aloe Vera under the veranda.

I threw the balloon up to the roof of the veranda and it would float back down to Luke slowly. It was the perfect toy. Luke laughed with glee as he caught the balloon. I could get rid of the dangerous string and stone given the little amount of helium inside.

Or so I thought.

I threw the balloon into the air, and it missed the roof. Seeing as it always went back down I didn't feel too concerned.

Up it went. Up, up, up. Luke watched in anticipation for it to come down. so did I.

The red balloon flying above out house

The balloon caught the breeze and began to fly above the car port. Surely it will run out of helium soon, right?

But up it continued. Up, up, up. Luke began to cry as he reached out for the balloon which flew further away from him.

I watched the balloon as it flew past the rooftops of the houses across the street. Maybe my mother in law would catch it on her way home from her morning exercise with her girlfriends? I don't think so. It just kept flying. Up, up, up.

I called Hendrik.

Can YOU see the red speck?

"Say..." (which is short for 'sayang' meaning 'darling') I said, as Luke sobbed beside me. "Can you see that red speck in the sky?"

"Ummm... No." He replied

I moved him to the left. "How about now?"

"No...?" he said, now confused what I was getting at.

"Well, that's Luke's balloon." I confessed.

"WHAT!?"

Maybe we will see it when we fly back to Australia. I felt so guilty letting the balloon go. Would Luke forgive me?

I was playing with Luke on the floor on Saturday morning when I heard a honking noise. I knew it was a seller of some sort as they often come past selling bread, vegetables, bakso, congee and the like. To my surprise, it was a man selling balloons! (A bit like what you see in American movies at the Zoo)

Image not mine

I ran outside and asked the man how much. 10,000 rupiah (one dollar). My father in law told the seller it was too expensive. I wasn't going to argue about what would probably be a 20 cent saving. 10,000 rupiah can buy so much more in Indonesia than it can in Australia. I'm happy to support people who are actively in search of an income in a good way by not stealing or corrupting.

I gave the man the 10,000 rupiah which will probably cover his lunch. I was confused which balloon to buy. The same one? A spongebob? How about Doraemon!

I gave Luke the big blue Doreamon balloon and he smiled. Such little price for a piece of joy and support for another.

Image not mine

Tears in Jakarta

I'm lying here in the light of a streetlight in our complex shining through the window of our upstairs bedroom. I'm finding it hard to sleep because I'm having blogging withdrawals. I'm typing this on my iPhone, but won't be able to publish until I find a hotspot.

I have so much to tell you. We stayed in Bali for just a day. We rushed through the airport and almost missed our flight. They distributed Luke a lifejacket before take off. Nice one, AirAsia!

The new 'budget' terminal in Jakarta is cleaner than Tullamarine. I like.

We have done various things since our arrival. I bought a notebook from Indomaret to 'blog' in until i get a chance to go on a computer, which may not happen until I'm in Melbourne.

Last week was my birthday, and celebrations continued throughout the week. Luke is doing well, but doesn't like the heat. He really needs a hair cut to enable him to better cope with the humidity. We only had a handful of hot days before we left Melbourne, so he didn't really know about hot weather. Winter baby.

It's interesting watching the differences in child raising here compared with back home. I'm really lucky that my Indonesian husband is tolerant of our circumstances in Australia.

This evening we went to the local mall (cos, really, there's not much else to do in Jakarta). Luke has been teething for a while so he gets upset. He began to cry and couldn't be consoled. There are some mothers rooms in malls, but not as many as in australia. We were going to the mothers room so that I could feed him. Breastfeeding in public is not a legal right in Indonesia like it is in Australia.

While going there, Luke was strapped to his pram and crying as we dodged the crowds and made our way to the one and only parents room. Shoppers and shop keepers alike were giving me dirty looks. Why would I let a child cry like that? My objective was to get to the room so I could better console him quickly.

And now I come to think of it, babies don't seem to cry here. Someone is always holding the baby, whether it be a grandparent or maid. If you told the community here about the 'cry it out' methods we have in the west, they would be shocked.

Often when I'm in malls, people always remark on how adorable Luke is because he is 'mixed'. People pull out their blackberries and take photos like he is a celebrity, random old ladies grab him.

We went to a cafe to indulge in my current favourite drink: avocado coffee. Old ladies looked at us disapprovingly and my assumption is because Hendrik helped me out with Luke (so unasian for a bloke to help) and because we had no nanny accommodating our needs.

The hardest thing is, my inlaws house isn't set up for a baby who is now crawling and getting into things (but I don't expect it to be). Someone needs to be with Luke every second, unlike at home where I can leave him to his own devices in his play pen.

We have no option but to co sleep here, which I'm sure is ringing off alarm bells in Australia. As a matter of fact, this is the way in Indonesia, as a crib is a luxury few can afford here. He naps on our bed, which means someone needs to be upstairs with him all the time too, as the floors here are ceramic and I wouldn't like him to fall on them.

We don't have a car seat either. It's another luxury (along with a car) that few Indonesians can have, and as it isn't the law, many don't see the need. We were offered one but Hendrik's car doesn't even have seatbelts so it would be useless.

Luke enjoyed the novelty at first but has since hated not having his own seat and has been difficult to travel with. The other day I suggested we put him in the carrier to travel by car which he has come to love. It's a bit restricting, but so much easier than managing a wriggly worm!

Another interesting observation, children have no set bed time here. Well, it's not like in Australia where the nurse suggested Luke be in bed by 7. Here that would be considered konyol (ridiculous).

He has been here for a week and has gotten to know pohpoh (grandma), kungkung (grandpa) & kuku (auntie) Lina. He's also getting to know his cousins.

It's great to finally show my son the country I fell in love with exactly 10 years to the day he was born. And while Indonesia will never be the same for me again, when we were walking around the complex the other evening and children were playing on the street, I can't wait for us to come again when he's bigger so that he can fall in love too.